One of the biggest regrets one can have professionally is not betting on themselves enough.
I know I have had this regret and I am working double time to correct it.
I have dedicatedly worked for decades for clients and organizations that employed me. Spent tremendous energy and effort. Traveled constantly, woke up early, slept late.
Don’t get me wrong, it was beneficial. I created impact. My clients gained bankable benefits and my organization progressed. I also learnt a lot, earned a paycheck, enjoyed security and perks of corporate life. Worked with exceptionally smart people. All good here.
But all of these (organization, smart peers, esteemed clients, titles) become a crutch instead of wind beneath your wings when you mistake “them” as the source of your success instead of “yourself”.
You discredit your contributions. You believe that you would be nothing without your title, your organisation, your peers, managers etc. You bet on them and not on yourself. That is where you lose all your power and all your light.
What does it look like to bet on yourself?
Picture this:
You have a client situation and your manager, who you really look up to, wants to tackle it in a certain way. You have a different view. You are in doubt because you don’t consider yourself half as smart as your manager. You still put your point across and have a logical discussion around it with your manager. Congratulations – You just bet on yourself.
You have significant number of years of experience. Your next promotion or another job offer can’t come to you because the industry doesn’t know you. You peers and clients know you, but you have no personal brand. Your progress at this point completely depends on your manager and the way your organization grows. Speaking at industry events can change this situation. You are unsure of the impact of course. You haven’t shared your ideas like this before. You still go ahead and ask your manager to consider sending you for the next event – You just bet on yourself
You are a woman who has bravely balanced family and career. It hasn’t been easy but you have found ways to make it happen. Now you want to share your hard learnt lessons with the next generation of women entering the workforce. It will be easy to team up with your organisation’s internship program, but their focus is different at this point in time. You consider rolling out a youtube channel where you share your lessons and answer questions from young women struggling out there. You are in doubt. You have no experience building an online audience. Besides what will your managers and peers think? You go ahead and launch it anyway – Yes, you did it again. You bet on yourself.
Here are the underlying themes from the above examples:
Betting on yourself means taking action to empower yourself and fulfil your dreams, specially when those actions don’t guarantee success
It calls for stepping out of your comfort zone
It almost always means facing doubts and still moving forward
It means not worrying about criticism, denial or failure
Finally, it means listening to your inner voice and strengthening your intuition with experiments
The opposite of betting on yourself is playing small.
You diminish yourself, your voice and your intuition and instead put others on a pedestal. If you are playing small enough, you might not even hear your inner voice.
Without a voice and an inner compass, you risk your growth and cede power to factors that might not be aligned with your best interest
On a recent Bridge to Leadership podcast, Sarah Khambatta, PCC said, “You have to ask yourself what are you gaining by playing small?” Are you avoiding risks? Are you avoiding ruffling feathers? Is playing small helping you conform to expectations of the people who matter to you?
There are many things Sarah suggests that can be done to liberate ourselves from the clutches of fear that holds us back. Some are surprisingly simple while others need a little more grit and discipline.
Start with identifying the tradeoff you get by playing small
Change your physical state – exercise or meditate
Take one action to bet on yourself, no matter how small it is. As long as you find it challenging, its worth doing
Don’t do it alone. Find a coach to help you through this
Listen to this podcast on Apple, Spotify or any of your favourite podcast destination
At times we play small because of toxicity in our environments. Discrimination and microaggressions can erode our confidence and we just want to put our head down and get through the day. At such times, teach yourself how to respond to such situations. Report it in a manner that is safe and appropriate for you. Find your tribe and a community where you can talk about it, get advice and support.
If you are a leader and see someone playing small,
check if there is anything in the environment that could be contributing to it including your own unconscious bias.
do everything in your power to see their capability and bring it out
encourage them to speak up in meetings
have a one on one if you feel they did not put their point across in the meeting
give them credit where its due
The aim of a platform like, Bridge to Leadership, is to empower every professional to bet on themselves, to enable them to be in charge of their own careers, their lives and make the impact they are meant to make.
Bridge to leadership 
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